Most people have encountered at least a few abrasive people in their lives - curt cashiers at Dunkin' Donuts, gruff receptionists at the doctor's office, greasy telemarketers who get nasty when their clients show a lack of interest in their product. Are these people acting immorally, or are they simply being rather unpleasant?
I think that the answer varies widely depending on the circumstances. If the unpleasant cashier had just learned of his dear brother's death in a car accident, then his manner is not just understandable, it may be morally justifiable, if it would cause him a great deal of emotional distress to adopt a pleasant manner. The distress he would incur by putting on a facade of pleasantness would far exceed the distress incurred by his customers.
If, on the other hand, the gruff receptionist had simply missed out on a few hours of sleep the previous night and did not feel like being personable, then she might be acting immorally, because she was causing more distress to her customers than she would incur by acting nicely. Of course, other variables could affect this situation as well - the customers could also be acting unpleasantly, in which case it would irk the receptionist more to be pleasant, for example.
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